早點回家

這一陣子，我每天都在外頭流蕩，不想早點回家。上兩個星期我幾乎是每天都跟我的兩個朋友一起。不過，可能是流蕩得久了，發覺每天跟朋友吃飯聊天越來越沒意思，而且錢也用得很快。有時候我會覺得他們真的好無聊，整天在找人聊天吃飯。以前我只是偶爾跟他們玩，可是最近我也太無聊了，竟然每天都跟他們無聊著。問題是，不跟他們在一起，我也會覺得無聊。-.- 天啊...我真的很無聊。反正我已經把弗吉尼亞大學還有威廉和玛丽大學申請完了。現在如果我每天都晚回家，我媽也不說我了。只是...心裏還是空虛。因爲我越跟朋友去玩，就越覺得我找不到能夠真正溝通的人。或許說，我沒有知心朋友。雖然我已經有了很多很好很好的朋友，可是我始終還是不能跟他們訴説一切，因爲他們根本無法了解我的經歷和有些想法。也許這是因爲我們終于大了，我們的想法，經過二十年的不同的環境和經歷，已經形成了一定的狀態，比較沒有從前一樣容易了解和接受陌生的人情事了。

White Christmas

This past year will be one of the most meaningful to me. From its beginning to its end, it has given me so many unforgettable memories. But the good thing is it began with something miraculous and ended with something wonderful. The struggles might have been some self-inflicted, some external, but now at least I feel like not everything is going against me anymore. :)

I spent the entire past week at home...hibernating. haha I didn't go out at all except for a walk with my mom and getting the mail. It has been a boring yet relaxing week, but man am I ready to get out of the house. It really sucks to not be able to drive.

Finally

It was finally approved. Secretly, I think it was a result of my own stupidity that it was not previously approved. But that's all in the past and I shouldn't reproach myself again and again. At least now I am finally a resident and can apply for financial aid. Good grief. I need to remind myself that I'm saving money. Goddamnit.

Sigh... after all those years of form-filling. It just goes to show the effectiveness of official-looking packaging.

To be honest, the implications of it hasn't hit be yet. I just feel extremely relieved that I don't have to worry about it anymore. After ten years of waiting, I wasn't going to be too disappointed if they didn't approve it again. So now I'm just surprised that it was passed so quickly. Actually I kind of feel like I wasted so much time. This could have happened a long time ago, if we had gotten a good legal representative to help us earlier.

So yeah. One less thing to worry about! :)

And once again:

Oh, Miraculous Life.

How incredible.

Suddenly something I had believed for a lifetime - however short - is false.

It feels unreal.

A dream.

And yet, I feel happier for it.

The love I had did not disappear.

Instead, it swelled, and I can begin to understand better.

Yes, I'm beginning to understand.

Thank you. So much. Words can't describe my gratefulness.

All I can say is...

Wow.

I love you.

Grandma

I miss my grandma. She died a long time ago (when I was 5 years old, actually), but today suddenly I remembered her and it made me really sad. Actually I was taking a shower, and I just randomly thought about my grandma. And then I broke into tears. It was so sudden and unexpected.